#TheChapMag Saturday’s Chap Olympiad Sold Out

Chap Olympiad » Events » Saturday’s Chap Olympiad Sold Out

Published on June 12th, 2012

Tickets are now sold out for The Eighth Chap Olympiad this Saturday. This year’s Olympiad occurs in the same summer as the “Other Olympics” and for this reason we have made it even more spectacular than ever before. As well as our usual ten track, field and bar events, we have a huge range of extra entertainment, sideshows and stalls peddling everything from trilbies to wet shaves.

This year’s 8th Chap Olympiad runs over two days, Saturday 7th and Sunday 8th July. Saturday’s events will run as follows:
1.00 The Pipeathlon: six contestants must complete a 10-yard course using three disciplines – pipe smoking, cycling and being carried by their servants across the finishing line.
1.20 Gentlemen’s Golf Club: contestants must hit a bowler hat into a large fishing net using a walking stick.
1.40 Swooning: one for the ladies. Chaps have to induce the ladies to swoon through any means possible.
2.00 Butler Baiting: teams of two (master and butler) must assemble a wardrobe impressive enough to satisfy the butler, by running back and forth between their master and a suitcase full of clothing.
2.30 Not Playing Tennis: contestants seated in armchairs play a game of tennis without getting up. The tennis ball is suspended on a wire hung between two hat stands.

3.00-4.00 During the interval, you will be entertained and educated in the arts of Omnicombat – a variation on the 19th century martial art of Bartitsu, or gentlemanly self defence with walking canes and umbrellas. This demonstration will be made by Albion and his son Merlin, both adepts. Albion has assured us that “We have no insurance cover, but it is very unlikely that anyone will suffer serious injury or death.”

4.00 Ironing Board Surfing. Contestants mount their ironing boards and are carried over the finishing line by their butlers and housekeepers.
4.20 Moustache Wrestling: two contestants must pluck a single hair from their opponent’s lip weasel.
4.40 Briefcase Phalanx: a line of ten chaps and chapettes, dressed for the office and clutching briefcases and handbags, creates a phalanx. Lone contestants must charge at them and try to break through to the secretary on the other side, who is ready to type a letter.
5.20 Shouting at Foreigners: contestants must pit their gentlemanly skills against a curmudgeonly, uncooperative foreign shop assistant.
5.40 Umbrella Jousting: two contestants, armed only with brollies and briefcases, must go at one another on bicycles and attempt to knock each other off.

Tickets are available for each of the two days individually, or at at a reduced price for both days. Tickets are available from www.thechapolympiad.com/ or by telephoning 020 7724 1617

21 Responses to “Saturday’s Chap Olympiad Sold Out”

  1. Joe Wells says:

    I rather fancy having a go at shouting at Foreigners as of late my hearing has deteriorated somewhat and I find it necessary to shout at everyone, although one of the side effects of the loss of hearing is a problem with my sense of balance which would preclude my participation in the Ironing Board Surfing Contest. I’ll just have to sit quietly on the sidelines but I wish all those brave souls who do participate the Best of British Luck.
    Toodle pip.

  2. Max von Oertz says:

    “Shouting at Foreigners.” Priceless!

  3. Glen Nicholson, esq. says:

    This makes me deliriously happy.

  4. Anthony Effingham-Daley says:

    Ah yes, shouting at foreigners. The Memsahib is of oriental extraction and sometimes a trifle hard of hearing (or at least feigns a little deafness!). As a result I have a modicum of experience in this particular discipline.

  5. Johnny Badger says:

    Saw the Olympics at Vintage Goodwood. In the Joust one of the lady jousters flashed her suspenders and unseated her virginal chap opponent I am still having flash backs but my therapist is confident that I will in time make a full recovery.

  6. Were that I was not in the States, where simply /everyone/ calls me “Johnny,” I would gladly try my hand at most anything listed here. Perhaps, someday, I’ll find a little bit of ready cash, make the flight over and toss my bowler in the ring. Not Playing Tennis sounds right up my ally.

    • "Stinky" Tibbenham-Pode says:

      It would be splendid if more of you jolly colonials could join in this celebration of chaphood in the mother country. I hear the Titanic met a sticky end, but if you got on another ship tomorrow you would arrive only a short train-ride from the field, and would still have time to have your summer flannels pressed and your spats whitened ready for the games.

  7. Ahem. As do the “Drinks.”

  8. "Stinky" Tibbenham-Pode says:

    Ah, shouting at foreigners! Something I find it necessary to do daily, as I am currently exiled on the continent, and find it astonishingly full of Frogs, Dagos, Eyeties and other swarthy wallahs who pretend not to understand the Queen’s English. There are even visiting Huns, grovelling and taking up too much space in the restaurants, and expecting me to understand their ridiculous accents. The won’t accept Sterling in the bars, and I don’t trust any of them further than I can throw them. Many of them try to escape to cleaner climes via the Tunnel thingy, and while I appreciate their desire for a civilised life, we must take care lest we are soon swamped by strange pastries, heavily perfumed women with small dogs, and men who have never worn tweed, and clean their teeth with flick-knives. They need watching, and if you would like occasional reports from the foreign field, I would be happy to supply them.

  9. Grenville Sopwith-Camel says:

    I am disappointed to see that Morris Dancer baiting is not on the list of events. A huddled group of these excrescences being severely beaten with their own bladders on a stick by all right minded gentelmen of taste would surely add some extra piquancy?

    • "Stinky" Tibbenham-Pode says:

      I hear that many Morris Dancers have another life as Honourable Members of Parliament, and therefore one of their mothers wrote a note excusing all of them on the grounds of not wishing to meet constituents while bearing evidence of flesh-wounds. Total lack of moral fibre, if you ask me!

  10. Bounder Ding Dong says:

    Looking forward to seeing all those fillies , OOOOOH Matron its nit time for bed yet , leave me alone

  11. Lady Elizabeth Percy says:

    Would someone kindly be able to inform attendees as to what the doormen on the gate will be allowing through? I assume that any alcoholic beverages will be confiscated for their own consumption? But will a picnic basket packed with food be permissible? Your advice on this matter would be gratefully received.

  12. Greetings. We have two spare tickets for Saturday 7th’s Olympiad surplus to our Team’s requirements. Interested parties please contact Deborah Woolf Vintage via our facebook page http://www.facebook.com/deborahwoolfvintage or at mail@deborahwoolf.com and we will respond forthwith. We trust a dabble with Tasseography and the Darjeeling will furnish us with a reliable weather forecast, clement weather this year we hope. Good luck with the swooning Chaps!

  13. Albion says:

    Hoping that there will be volunteers for the Omnicombat part during the interlude, as son Merlin and I would like to train as many gentlemen as possible in the art of Omnicombat, lest the barbarian hordes should attempt to subvert decent society using that most direct form of persuasion; violence.

  14. Fortas, AVM (Retd) says:

    Sports? And NOT on a wednesday afternoon?

    The country is going to the dogs.

  15. Dryad Humpington-Cum-Freaquaintly, OBE & CVNT says:

    I’m frightfully disappointed that the old competitive game of dowager and dame grape peeling isn’t on the cards this time. What what.

  16. Still one spare ticket left for Saturday! £20 if you can collect from NW8, we will cover the (rather pricy..ahem) online booking fee!
    Please contact Deborah Woolf Vintage via our facebook page http://www.facebook.com/deborahwoolfvintage or at mail@deborahwoolf.com

  17. [...] Not Playing Tennis: contestants seated in armchairs play a game of tennis without getting up. The tennis ball is suspended on a wire hung between two hat stands. (Via) [...]

  18. Greg says:

    I was there for the briefcase phalanx, was absolutely a sight to see.

    Blast from the past, funny I came across this article.

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